Goal Post Syndrome

The term goal post syndrome means that once you set and accomplish a goal, you set another goal. There isn’t anything wrong with setting goals and working to achieve them. The problem occurs when you don’t take time to appreciate your accomplishments and show gratitude towards yourself for the steps you took to achieve them.

 This pops up in my day to day. After completing my Master’s Degree, I immediately jumped into a doctorate program. I was recently inducted into the National Honor Society for my work in my doctorate program. You would think I would be happy and overjoyed at this accomplishment.

 Nope. Not at all. In fact, hours after the ceremony, I found myself thinking about a colleague in the field. I told myself this person had a more impressive title and probably made more money than me. Then I felt discouraged and began the downward spiral of questioning my decisions and saying I messed up. This is partially accurate. As an undergrad in college, my grades were horrible. I can look back now and see the reasons for this. My Father passed away after a long battle with cancer in my last year of high school, and the unresolved grief contributed to my poor choices in those years. It was years before I realized this, and I still work from a place of unforgiveness. It seems easier and the right thing to do, to beat me up over the past.

 Beating myself up is not productive. It is not the right thing to do. I will admit there are times when beating myself up seems to give me a boost, but in the long run it is more detrimental. So instead, I am learning to capture and turn those thoughts around. The answer to goal post syndrome is to appreciate your accomplishments and reflect and find value in your process and the steps you took to achieve your goals. Ambition and goal setting is healthy, it generates hope, and then you are in a position to do your best work in the service of others. Bhard on yourself may feel right. Still, in the end, its use runs out. So how can you appreciate your work that you engage in when you pursue your goals? Take some time to appreciate your journey. If you do this you won’t be dependent on results for internal joy.